Destructo Returns
I crawl forth from the muck, battered and torn from my escape. I will make my enemies pay dearly for this pathetic attempt to erase my existance. No Groupon will save them from the deadly fee I will charge. I have returned.
Parent Speak
Here is an actual conversation that I had with my daughter when we were having dinner at one of those salad / buffet places. I love how she just accepts my humor. She came back from the bread and pasta area with some macaroni and cheese and said, “Is this [...]
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- Destructo Returns by Destructo, E…
I crawl forth from the muck, battered and torn from my escape. I will make my enemies pay dearly for this pathetic attempt to erase my existance. No Groupon will save them from the deadly fee I will charge. I have returned. - Parent Speak by JeffHere is an actual conversation that I had with my daughter when we were having dinner at one of those salad / buffet places. I love how she just accepts my humor. She came back from the bread and pasta area with some macaroni and cheese and said, “Is this [...]
- The Heroic Age by Destructo, E…Recently, the talking heads on television have been referring to something called the Heroic Age. Apparently, after decades spent as boozing self-destructive narcissistic assholes, the so-called heroes of the world have decided to actually behave like heroes. Whoop-dee-frikin-doo. Wolverine decides to shave and we need to create a new update [...]
- Facebook Thoughts by JeffI’ve been thinking about creating some kind of profile on Facebook in order to increase my readership, but I’m getting really tired of the whole social networking thing. I remembered this great video and thought I would share it. Isn’t it funny that, at least to most Americans, folks from [...]
- The Sentry? Wait... what? by Destructo, E…[Excerpt of communication log DI05192010-01982-0023:0051] KANG: Hey, it’s Kang. Did you hear about Bob? DESTRUCTO: Um, no. What happened? Wait, who’s Bob? KANG: He’s dead. DESTRUCTO: Who’s dead? KANG: Seriously dude, Thor killed him. DESTRUCTO: Killed who? KANG: Bob. DESTRUCTO: Bob who? KANG: The Sentry. Bob. You know, a million [...]
- New Henchmen by Destructo, E…Because of some recent changes around the lair, I’ve had to get some new henchmen. It’s always fun to have a new batch of recruits. They do the darndest things. Here are the top ten mistakes made by new henchmen: They drink too much coffee. – I have no idea [...]
- First steps by Destructo, E…From the Illinois State Gazette: May 5, 2010 – Campus News Classes were disrupted briefly Monday as campus police investigated a strange act of vegetative vandalism. The grassy area between the library and the social sciences building suddenly erupted with unnatural growth, covering most of the eastern snack area with [...]
- Enter Nightshade by Destructo, E…[Transcript of audio log DI04272010-00214-1343:1352] DESTRUCTO: Crap, I’m bored. Hey! Thirty-one! Come here! HENCHMAN 000031H: Yes sir? DESTRUCTO: I’m out of ideas, thirty-one. I need an idea man. I’m promoting you to evil assistant. HENCHMAN 000031H: What exactly is that? Is that what Ms. Jasmine was? DESTRUCTO: No, you idiot. [...]
- Earth Day by Destructo, E…Today is Earth Day, which is one of the most generic holidays ever created. I mean, Cheese Day is pretty generic or Food Day would be even more so, but Earth Day covers the whole damn planet. I suppose Solar System Day or Galaxy Day would be even worse. Today [...]
- Ass Kicking Time by Destructo, E…My henchmen are all very excited about the new movie “Kick-Ass” that hits the theaters this weekend. From what we can tell from the trailers, the film’s about these regular people that put on costumes and go out and fight crime. My henchmen love movies like this, because they always [...]
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Welcome , today is Saturday, January 28, 2012